Someone casually mentioned to me today that I haven't blogged in ages. Yea, I actually haven't. It's not that there's nothing to write, but there's just so much to write, I don't even know where to begin. Should I write about my life, my dilemmas and bore you even more with dentistry? Or should I write about fun interesting things that are happening in my life... If it's the latter, then yea.. I would have NOTHING to write.
Don't get me wrong, dentistry is in it's way fun and interesting, the things that happen behind the scenes and the fun we have just being dental students. I suppose it's quite a skewed sense of fun, perhaps even geeky, but I guess that's what makes dental students such a special bunch.. Something's bound to happen when you put 60 Type A people together for 5 years.. We probably fuel each other to be more Type A than we already are.
Is fourth year hard? yea... in it's way, it's easy as well, cause it seems like we're stressed out constantly that the stress level has become chronic, so much so that the body adapts to it. I find my way to work around it, even though it ain't the best way, cause it would bite me in the bum most of the time, but I procrastinate when I can, or prioritize, to put it nicely.
I love what I'm doing, I love it even more that I get to directly help patients. working at lifecare has just opened my eyes to a few things that I was never conscious about, it's made me think a lot about what kind of clinician I want to be and what I don't want to be. It's made me find my bearings and come to realize that it's not so heeehee haha out there because someone's going to chase you for your bottomlines and I would have to make a decision of what I will do and what I will not do. If you're reading this and see me when I'm out practicing, and realized i've become a crazy money chasing dentist, I give you every right to chide me and knock some sense into me. Because the last thing I want, is to forgo the love for this craft and the help it can bring for something so menial like money.
This year has been really harsh to me emotionally. I guess when i get older in life, I've got to face up to the reality that death is imminent, but I just don't expect people around their 30's to pass so quickly and so suddenly. It's gripped my heart and burdened it with grief, for he was such a lovely man, so gentle and willing to share and teach, so sincere and so fervent for God. I guess the only consolation i have is that I know I will see him again one day and tell him how much he has blessed my life. this though, does not take away the pain of knowing that someone so wonderful has left.
That's just a short blurp on my life so far... nothing really fascinating on the whole, just a lot of... Such is life.. Make the most of it.
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