I have been rather amused of late. Random gym chat ups and funny people coming up to me and speaking to me in the mall. It's weird, but at the same time, it's quite nice getting compliments from time to time. Only until it starts getting awkward and weird. -_-"
Some of the hardest decisions to make in life are those that you have to make against what you desire just because you know that is what's best and practical. Some decisions you know you have to make that you know will hurt, but at the same time, it's good to start preparing yourself for it so that when it actually happens, it won't hurt as much. I know there are some who'd argue their case and say that it'd just be a self fulfilling prophesy, but I'd rather prepare myself for what might happen than to meet it head on unprepared.
Sometimes you have to sacrifice what you love to pursue what you love to do for the rest of your life. That's occasionally the cruelty of life that something's gotta give for the pursuit of happiness. I pray for the courage to try things out when the time comes, I pray for the strength to not give up, but I pray too for the wisdom to know when to let things go, to have the courage to stand alone so that passions can be pursued.
I've mentioned it before that there really is no greater testimony of God's grace than to be able to wake up everyday thankful that you love what you're waking up to do and to enjoy every hard waking moment of it. If he were to pursue his passions, I'd be more than happy for him, I'd celebrate with him, even if I know that at the end of the day, I might not be pursuing them with him. I know I'd still be glad for him and pray for him each day that he'd find that joy that I feel.
I know it's at times silly for me to think so far ahead and to worry bout what might happen, but like I always am, I'd rather be prepared. I know I'd be in tears, but I know that at the same time, someone I love would be living a dream and that in itself is priceless. Everything in God's time.
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