Reflections during a boring lecture

A moment during service, I felt God's spirit move within me and uplift me. I was nervous singing on stage, yet I know on stage, His presence stilled me. I let it go at the last song, indeed, I'm not ashamed of the gospel, and there's so much freedom in His truth!

With so much going on at home, I really do yearn for everyone to hear of His gospel, I want my family to be saved, I yearn for them to receive salvation. Because you want to share the best with your family, what more a gift so great like His grace and His justification. The thought pains me that at the end of the day, we might not be in the same place for eternity. The only thought that brings me some solace is that hopefully, with God In my life as a testimony and perhaps them hearing of His grace, that at the end of the day, at the last breath, they seek Christ to save them, they call out to Him.

Well. After service, one of the aunties was speaking to me and we were just talking about age and settling down. I agree with her when she says we have to find ourselves as women first before finding someone to settle down with. And I think what's more important than finding ourselves is finding God in our lives. We should also as women, while trying to find that special someone, we work towards building ourselves into the woman God wants us to be. Building up on skills like motherhood, taking care of their husbands and all the other Godly attributes. That's all for now. God bless!

When Boy meets Girl

Am currently reading Joshua Harris's Boy meets Girl and I'm starting to like the term COURTSHIP. That's it! It may seem like the most hackneyed term to use, but that's what we need! Courtship before relationship. I'll blog more about it when I have the time. I just liked the quotes he used from Elisabeth Elliot about the roles of men and women, it's in the chapter, "If boys were to be Men, would girls be Ladies?"

I do agree with him on the counts on where society is about gender roles and it's so baffling to me cause I am proud to embrace being a lady and the roles we have as women. I have things I've gotta work on, but I have no desire, what so ever, of putting on the pants and being the man!

Here's what Elisabeth Elliot wrote, "The world cries for men who are strong-strong in conviction, strong to lead, to stand, to suffer. I pray that you will be that kind of man- glad that God made you a man, glad to shoulder the burden of manliness in a time when to do so will often bring contempt." I pray this for my male friends, that you will stand up and rise up from being boys and undertaking the manly roles God has ordained for you!

And for the women, she wrote, "A real woman understands that man was created to be the initiator, and she operates on that premise. This is primarily a matter of attitude. I am convinced the woman who understands and accept with gladness the difference between masculine and feminine will be, without pretense or self-consciously, woman". I also like how Josh Harris also talks about cultivating the attitude that motherhood is a noble and fulfilling calling and to not be shy about embracing it and to practice homemaking skills, encouraging men/brothers in Christ to compliment sisters when they strive to learn these skills! Amen!

Zone out

Sometimes, just sometimes, I fall into this zone, a zone where I reckon no one, but God, can take me out of. I'm not upset, I'm not unhappy, I'm not angry, I'm just not feeling right.

When someone you know leaves the world, someone you know hasn't received Christ, the loss is even greater and the pain even more. I ask myself why I never did share His word with him, was I too young, too immature and too incompetent to share His word with someone so much older.

It pains me so much to know that someone has left this world without receiving His salvation. My heart cries and aches at that thought. I think about all my family, friends and people that I love who have yet to receive Christ.. How much time do I have left to bring them to salvation? The thought scares me.. What happens if they never do?

I know I'm content at this point in time. I know I have the Lord's peace with me.. but at the same time.. As much as I try to think and tell myself it's over, it's all over and I've moved on, I know part of me hasn't. My intuition doesn't allow me to move on from where I left off. I am content, but my heart knows better that that's not all. I really don't know what to do. Lord. If this is not of your kingdom and not from you, please take it away.