Life's little moments

Moving out has so far proven to be a great thing! =) I love the freedom of being able to cook for myself, having the discipline to wake up, bus to uni, be on time and still have time to get coffee on the way. Well.. There are inconveniences too, like having to take a bus home after uni and waiting under the hot sun before coming home to get changed for gym.. But then again, these are just minor lifestyle adjustments I have to make for a more wholesome overseas experience. After all, if I were to stay after my degree, this is what I've got to get used to right!

Anyway.. uni has been good so far. It has been rather intense (i'm sure its full potential of intensity has yet to be shown), but i've had a few late nights at uni and to be honest, I'm enjoying it. I'm loving 3rd year and its units as a whole, I'm learning more and getting more hands on! That's the part I enjoy!

I guess this may or may not come as a surprise, but I've finally taken that leap of faith and led at CNC last Sunday! It was a nerve wrecking experience before I went for my rehearsals, but somehow, I think the Holy Spirit led, it equipped and just empowered me. I've never felt more at ease on stage than that, I've never felt more confident or sang as soulfully. It is indeed what they mean when they say "God doesn't call the qualified, He qualifies the called". =)

This week has been rather special for me, apart from starting it off at church, passing my barrier exam, finishing my crown preps and stuff.. Sherms made me cry.. He made me cry so hard.. and for the right reasons. I know it's not as if it's been ages since I saw him, in fact, he made me dinner on monday (which was awesome btw). But you know how it feels when you miss someone so terribly? It's bizarre cause I've never felt this way before. The feeling that I cannot get enough of him, that I'd like to spend every free moment with him to share every moment of our lives together. I'm not besotted and losing my mind. I know my priorities but it's an insane feeling to have. The way my heart feels when we part is like an aching pain yearning for the next time it reunites with its other half.

So.. Tuesday night or rather, wednesday morning at 1230am.. I got a call from him. My heart skipped a beat thinking that he was home and was calling me to catch up.

Then he said "Did you get my text?"
I said, "nope. Did you just get home?"
"Look out the window.." (I walked to the window) "Do you see a red blinking light?"

Honestly, I didn't know what to say or what to think for a moment.. and didn't even think of going down to see him until he said "would you like to come down to see me instead of the window?". He had cycled from work to home and stopped by en route. As much as it was on the way home, I still felt that sudden sense of warmth overwhelming me. That sudden realization of "this is why I'm in love with this man, this is why my heart feels the way it feels" and the tears just flowed, uncontrollably.

It may sound rather cheesy if I say it too many times, but it really feels like I've fallen in love for the very first time in my life.. (mushy content ahead.. You have been warned..)

Sherms, thank you for making me feel so special, so loved and so cared for. Thank you for being the man that you are and for being the man in my life. You make my heart beat rhythms it never had and dance so freely on the tunes of your love.. You, my dearest, are the other element to the chemistry of my heart.

TWENTY FIVE and counting...

So it's official.. I'm 25. Yes. Quarter of a century, good times. Well... My birthday was... Just another tuesday, so was valentine's day. Nothing spectacular, maybe apart from dinner with Emma, it was.. quiet.

 I suppose what got to me the most was when everyone started asking me whether or not I was going to do anything special with Sherms or what he'll be doing with me. Cause as much as I'd like to say that Valentine's day is just another day, it isn't. I'd like to have my partner spend that special day with me, but school and work just wasn't kind enough to offer us that luxury. Did I expect to feel this way on my birthday? I didn't, and I don't want to.

I've had worse birthdays before, ones where I'd block out for as long as I can and this would probably be one of them. Nothing to remember about, but everything to forget.

To make things a little better.. Perth decided to pull the Valentine's day card on me too. Everywhere I went.. it was just couples couples couples.. couples reservations.. couples menu.. like, seriously..?

Anyhow, I saw this video on Facebook and even though it's quite cheesy, it's rather sweet. =) and no.. That was not how valentine's day was like for me. Neither would I expect it to ever be. Just cause...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=YLJjsCwLeww

Like they say.. No expectations, no disappointments. Something I've learnt after 25 years.. Only have expectations for yourself never for others. That way, you'll never disappoint yourself and never be disappointed by others because it was never meant to be to begin with.

Seasons

Two weeks into uni, though timetable isn't as full on as it should be (i.e. I still don't have to stay back for lab sessions yet), but this 8 to 5 timetable with half an hour lunch is going to be interesting. I am happy to be back and into the routine.

Well.. I've finally found  place to move out to, it's definitely further from St Catherine's to OHCWA, but its a place i can call my own. I really can't wait to cook for myself and be able to have a larger personal space. I'm not complaining about my college experience, I love it to be honest, but it's time to move on in life. =) Not yet in the PHASE of life, but in the different stages of it.

Apart from that, I'm quite excited about what this new year would hold and how God will speak His will into my life. I'm starting to lead at CNC, i'm freaking out, but I know there is no such thing as "this is not the season" because it will always be the season when it's God's will and intention. I know He has His great plans for my life and for my year. I heard this sermon on sunday at Sherwin's church, that "If you walk in obedience, you are under the authority of God and He is greater than all the seasons". So this year... Is the season of having an unreasonable illogical expectation and anticipation for my life.