Holiday reflections

Easter holiday was so timely. I just needed to go away from everything and just be with people who I know truly care and love me. College has been taking a toll on me. I don't dislike it, but I don't enjoy living here anymore. There's too much drama, far too mundane, that goes on. People too ungracious with distasteful attitudes. That's more or less life, I know, you don't get to choose who lives in the world around you, but I reckon, I should get to choose who I live with, and I just want to get out of here.. PRONTO!

Apart from that, Adelaide was beautiful! At least I was shutter happy! Took so many photos over the span of three days that I wonder, how did I even do that! But above all the nice shopping, (thanks to my big brother and his girlfriend for sponsoring my little splurges), what I hold close to my heart is when my brother prayed for me. The first time in my life, he prayed for me, while driving me to the airport. I cannot describe just how this makes me feel, but it meant so much so much to me. I know at times I don't say it enough or show it enough, but if I could, I'd really want him to know just what it meant to me, that simple prayer meant the world to me. It is also through this that I know that God is working in my family, that He answers our prayers. I hope, one day, I can have the same prayer with my parents too.

Well.. I miss my family so much. My parents and especially lil Jadon. I can't help but want to fly back to singapore to see him grow up, I want to be there when he takes his first step. I'm his auntie Joce, yet I'm so far from him. I want to read him stories and fairy-tales, teach him how to count and teach him the alphabet.. I guess I can only wait till the holidays. But as of now, I think I'm taking care of his lil wardrobe.. You're never too young to have style right! =D

Thoughts that overwhelm

.STRESS. Strength Through Reaching Ends, Skies and Stars. No.. I'm not delusional. Yes.. I'm Stressed. First time ever in my life, I'm actually stressed out. Clinic drains me and there's so much material to cover I wish I had 48 hours to spare a day. But sadly, as special as I think I am in God's eyes, He's not giving me that privilege.

I've heard enough of.. "you're too hard on yourself". Really? Am I?

You don't really know how hard you are on yourself or how far you're pushing yourself until you actually do. Fact is.. True to an ACS line.. "the best is yet to be", simply cause if you push and stretch yourself that much further, you can reach even further, even higher. That's not to say to stretch till you snap, it's stretching your limits, your boundaries, your capabilities so that you can do more and be more. I don't think that's asking too much of myself or me coming too hard on myself. Especially if it's for something that I love, for something that I'm passionate about.

Truth is, my life is good, great and amazing in fact. I look at what is happening around the world and just realize how small and how insignificant my worries are. Compared to a child who has lost her parents in the earthquake, or the family that has lost everything in one day, or the fear and turmoil to be living in in the middle east.. My life has the peace like a river. God has been so gracious and so generous with His love, that someone as undeserving as me have what I have. I have His love, I have His mercy, I have His wrath turned away from me.. I have His promise of eternity, I have His promise of His kingdom. Me. Small insignificant me. 1 out of 6 billion, 1 out of the whole universe and galaxy. He has chosen me and given me all these. How can I not be overwhelmed?

My encounter with natural teeth and courtship!

It has been an amazing yet extremely tiring week. I don't even recall doing as much this week.. In fact, I've never felt so exhausted from uni. I think drilling just drains me. That said, we drilled into natural teeth this week and it was nothing short of AMAZING! I kid you not! The feeling of the drill/bur into natural teeth feels so different from what we're doing on the frasaco teeth. Yes, I may seem overly obsessed with dentistry and drilling, but I can't help but feel so blessed to be in dental school. The sweet sounds of the drill, the adrenaline that runs through my veins when I pick up my high speed hand piece and just the concentration needed to create a conservative preparation.. These drive me, motivate me and empower me. Dent school is, without a doubt, a pressure pot, yet I know, I won't want any less of it!

I'm STILL reading Boy Meets Girl, simply cause I don't really have as much time for a book as I would love to, but I really am starting to love the term.. COURTSHIP. It's a time where you get to know one another to see if you're ready/compatible for a relationship. To be a boyfriend/girlfriend in his terms means to get into a relationship that is pre-engagement of that sort, that being a boyfriend/girlfriend would be being in a relationship with the intention of marriage. That, of course, in our social context, may seem like a whole load of bull, but it truly makes a lot of sense.

Courtship is when you maintain friendship, getting to know the person in his/her environment, when they are interacting with their friends, when they are truly them. We tend to rush into relationships too prematurely in this day and age.. I don't deny falling prey to the emotions, the bubbly airy feeling love brings and wanting to be with someone you feel has gripped your heart. Retrospectively speaking, I reckon that's why those relationships were a thing of the past. Oh well.. I used to say that I'm ready for a relationship, but I suppose I have to take that back now, I'm ready for courtship.. and only ready for a relationship when I've found that special someone God has planned for me. For now, I'm courting a passion called Dentistry!